12.6.2008 - Tally Ho
Dear English,
Why art thou so ugly? Why hast thou no sense of fashion?
Still, London is after all my favourite City, I can't help it, always was, always will be. Or is it Paris? Wha'evva... Of course I forgot to buy tea and biscuits but groceries are so hellishly expensive that I better get them at Edeka-Dent (a famously posh supermarket down the street, will report from there in a few days).
Well now.
After several delicious British Airways sandwiches I safely landed at Hamburg International Airport. It had been my first flight in 15 years without tranquilizers or alcohol involved, I do believe I have cured myself from fear of flying. Well, at least slighty.
Have I ever told the story of how I was cured from my fear of snakes? No? I shall tell it some other time. It features an albino tigerpython who goes by the name of Roswitho...
Completey unrelated what follows next.
There's nothing as humiliating as bacherlor parties and I had hoped never to be part of one, neither as participant nor as protagonist. But since an old friend of mine is getting married, I have no choice but to join in and try not to vomit from all body parts whilst celebrating with her and her friends and some low keys strippers in the Hamburg red light district. Why me? I'm the most vippest of VIPs, I can't be asked to booze my head off on Kilkenny's in an Irish Pub and get hit on by ugly men who are too pissed to see I'm out of their league.
I like german beer! And I don't like Irish or English or Scottish, they are small and fat and they all look the same and they all say the same and on and on and on... For the sake of political corectness, I add that I dislike most other nationalites too, especially my own!
I want a cigarette and I don't have any, it's hard to be a social smoker. I should finally decide what I want to be when I grow up, a smoker or a non smoker. Once I pass puberty, which will be in approximately 12 years, I will look like Marianne Faithful and possibly I will have slept with Mick Jagger too. No. I promise, I will never sleep with Mick Jagger. Sorry Mick. Good Night!
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Über mich
"... ist nicht nur wahnsinnig intelligent, sondern sieht sensationell aus..." Harald Schmidt (ISchmidt, 24. Nov. 2005)
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